Welcome to Amerikwa – Enjoy a Pepsi
Where Mammon meets Dildolech.
Welcome to Amerikwa, where late stage capitalism meets cultural POZ.
For those of you who did not bring your barf bags and were not able to stomach the entire commercial, I will summarize it for you: Kendall Jenner drops everything she is doing during the middle of a photo shoot to join a protest (surely against Donald Drumpf) and along the way she grabs a Pepsi. She then confronts one of the riot police and hands him the Pepsi. The officer drinks the beverage, the crowd cheers, the world is saved. So brave. Thank you Kendall Jenner for saving the world. Oh, I forgot to mention that during the commercial, a Muslim woman in a hijab captures the whole thing on camera. Once again, so brave, so multicultural, so progressive.
The ad has since been pulled by Pepsi since it has received massive backlash from the left of all places. They are upset that Pepsi is trivializing the struggle of groups like BlackLivesMatter. They say the ad really “missed the mark”. However, I disagree. This advertisement encapsulates modern day America perfectly. Sorry leftists but this is the future you chose.
For years now, leftists have been raising Hell to demand that American corporations become more socially conscious. Well, Mission Accomplished. With the exception of a corporation or two selling their Chicken Sandwiches of Hate™, most American corporations have completely signed on to all left-wing social justice causes.
Libertarians are right about the market. Someone will always find a way to meet the demands of the market. If you build it, they will cum… but I digress. Even Noam Chomsky predicted that eventually capitalism would become “anti-racist”. What better way to ensure the largest amount of consumers? Less discrimination = more consumers = more profits.
And don’t we folks in the Alt Right know that if we do not hold the right opinions, the failed Marxist revolutionary turned corporate HR director will pay us a visit to talk about our suspicious internet activity. Also, isn’t it interesting that the only people having their political opinions silenced by corporations are people in the Alt Right? Meanwhile, you can bitch about how oppressed gay people are and someone will probably give you a medal.
We now see the divergence of the Old Left and the New Left. The Old Left railed against corporate cronyism in favor of workers rights while the New Left was more interested in fighting for left-wing social issues like feminism, multiculturalism and the LBGT agenda. For quite some time, these two forces were united in their struggle against the evil capitalist cishet White supremacist patriarchy. However, the New Left has since become the very bourgeoisie that they used to fight against. There is nothing more bourgeois than some queer corporate CEO wearing a #StayWoke T-shirt while meeting with Deray McKesson, the leader of BLM. Meanwhile, good ole boys in the local teamsters union are being left behind by their comrades.
What is to become of these leftists who are more concerned about economic justice, worker’s rights and a robust welfare state to ensure that no one falls through the cracks? Can you rail against crony capitalism and international finance while simultaneously signing on to the same cultural agenda? Can you have your cake and eat it too?
The goal of capitalism is to turn us all into interchangeable cogs in a globalist capitalist system. Isn’t it interesting that since the great civil rights movement of the 1960s, where women began entering the workforce and we opened our borders to the third world, that the wages of the working class have been unusually stagnant? Who would’ve thought that radically increasing the size of the workforce would have such an impact on wages??? Surely, these mega corporations have no incentive whatsoever to constantly advocate for mass third world immigration to increase the supply of workers.
It also turns out that diversity correlated with stronger levels of union unattachment. I thought diversity was our strength? Well it is a strength for someone and it’s not the workers. What’s more important though: blue collar jobs or trans-inclusive restrooms. That’s what I thought. Checkmate bigots.
Even when the magical Negro-in-Chief, Barack Obama, was given a carte blanche by the American people in 2008 to bring about massive economic reforms, all you got were some corporate bailouts of the automobile industry and a healthcare bill which forced you to buy health insurance from a major insurance corporation. But hey, at least gay marriage was made legal.
Oh Bernie Bros, where art thou? Are you expressing your impotent rage on social media about Drumpf? Do you find yourself nodding your head in agreement with Le Current Year Man, John Oliver, about the Cheeto-faced despot occupying the White House? His show is on HBO, right? HBO is owned by Time Warner, you know, the multinational corporate media conglomerate worth tens of billions of dollars. Surely, they don’t have an agenda, right? Of course not! (LOL)
Leftists find themselves at the interesting intersection of where Mammon meets Dildolech – where materialism, global capitalism and consumerism meet hedonism, decadence and ethnomasochism. Where virtue signalling can be channeled towards increasing corporate profit margins. God Bless Amerikwa!
Are you a socially conscious SWPL with patrician tastes? Go see the hot new Hollywood blockbuster Get Out – a scary thriller with miscegenation! While you’re at it, enjoy yourself an ice cold Pepsi (Who knows? You may save the life of the next Skittles Martin). After the film, hop on your iPhone 7, open up the Snapchat app and take a selfie with your fag Whopper from Burger King. What better way to show that you hold the right opinions than to have them sponsored by multinational mega-corporations?
Just remember this leftists, you can’t fight against corrupt global capitalism while simultaneously lining their pockets with more corporate profits. You can’t fight “The Man” when you are “The Man”.
Sadly, most of the leftists who read this will not abandon their retarded cultural agenda because they would rather live under corporate oppression than appear to be racist, xenophobic or Islamophobic. Can you blame them though? They no longer chant “Down with the Bourgeoisie!” because they are the bourgeoisie. They are just doing what is in their economic self-interests. They have abandoned the working class to virtue signal, alongside corporate America, about how much they love Black people. So brave.
So, what’s it going to be leftists? Are you going to join the sole authentic resistance movement of our time? Or are you instead joining your pseudo-resistance to virtue signal:
Choose wisely and remember: #StayWoke™®©